PHOTOGRAPHY

SELF PORTRAITS

This is every self-portrait I have ever taken. My history in a timeline. Each crystallizes where I am and where I'm headed. I hope that by the end, you see the beginning, you see the evolution of my skills through the years and understand that to produce good work, it takes time.

And time we have.

PHOTOGRAPHY

SELF PORTRAITS

MAY 4th

This was the last real good photoshoot before everything went downhill.

I started shooting 9 p.m., on a roll until my camera died at 1 a.m. I went home ecstatic, accomplished.

And maybe even a little deranged.

DECEMBER 13th

Because of depression, I was still kinda out of it by the time my 21st birthday rolled around. Very out of it actually. I'd fallen very out of love with photography. Uninspired and tired. Constantly.

It took me close to a month to work up the will and energy to take these photos. Existing at the time was so exhausting and draining, I'm surprised I made it behind the camera.

Surprised I took them at all.

MAY 11th

I didn't edit these until after graduation. It took me a good while to get around to them.

This might be a little controversial, but I've gotta say, I think I like the editing process much more than the photography itself.

Don't tell anyone though. Well, until the odd chance I become a photo editor down the line.

2022

2023

MAY 2nd

For this photoshoot, I wanted to do Black & White but in color.

It was the first photoshoot I'd done in a really, really long time. Using a single strobe and a simple theme really helped bring everything together.

I had fun. I was in a really good mood this day. I think it shows haha.

DECEMBER 8th

I am in my dark green phase. It is my new favorite color and I thought it lended well to the gold.

I learned not all birthday pictures have to be celebratory. I don't have to fake expressions. These annual photos can be whatever I want them to be.

MAY 2nd

These were some quick eye photos I took with $20 Amazon lights in my apartment for my Capstone project because it was due that week.

APRIL 29th

I looked for baby's breath in pastel colors, but found them only in white.

Had I found them in pastels, you'd be looking at a different picture.

When I find the pastel flowers again, I'll show you how they come out.

APRIL 14th

I owned a camera that wouldn't sync with the strobe triggers. So how does your flash go off in the same instant as the camera?

1/125 of a second is too quick. I can't click the shutter at the exact 1/125 of a second, but I can give myself a longer window: 0.8". It works because even as a slow exposure, the flash freezes motion anyway.

APRIL 12th

Experiment, experiment, experiment.

That is what I would do in the studio whenever I had the chance. This was my first time experimenting with a 3-light set-up. I was hopelessly enamored with the multi-colored shadows.

This lighting inspired April 29th's Flower Lips.

APRIL 3rd

I wasn't content with the lighting so I thought the photos were a complete loss. That is until I started to have fun in the edit. Then they weren't so bad.

MARCH 27th

I'd bought a furry yellow blanket at the beginning of the school year and just had to shoot it. These are okay. I still think the yellow/blue contrast was a nice touch.

2021

MARCH 8th

What makes a photo a stopper? Why do some photos make people stop in their tracks while others don’t?

The hand holding a compact mirror, is it the lighting? The contrast between the yellow and purple? Or is it the momentary solving, like you don’t quite know what is going on?

What about the other two? These aren't stoppers. So why is that? Is it the edit?

MARCH 4th

I'd experiment the hell out of everything when I was at school.

What does this do? What does that do? What if I use continuous lights, one red, one blue? What if I use a slow shutter? What if I zoom in and out? What if I zoom in and out during a slow shutter using red and blue lights?

I walked in without a plan and this is what I walked out with.

NOVEMBER 6th

When in college, I really wanted to do a shoot with the wallpaper on my apartment's walls. It was a very nice green but for the final look, I edited it to look grey and more cohesive.

I also shot a tutorial for class "How to shoot Self-Portraits" to go with.

NOVEMBER 27th

Okay, so you've seen those ads at the mall, on clothing store windows. Cool groups of friends smiling and laughing in a random living room, living out their young beautiful lives under a hard flash.

That is what I was going for.

Some part of me's always thought of that lifestyle as, well, attainable.

I just didn't know all it would take is a flash, props and some make-up.

AUGUST 13th

I bought a colorful lollipop when I visited Tijuana with my family and I couldn't help but contrast it with white. White shirt, white background.

MAY 11th

I was inspired by the line, "There's someone under your bed." I couldn't get it out of my head, so my sister helped me out with these, because getting out from under the bed was tedious after every shot. that's her otter too haha.

We used a speed light for both photos and then I joined them together.

MAY 10th

I posed in front of my TV and covered my speed light with a yellow cellophane sheet.

The sunlight peaking through wasn't planned for. It was just reflecting off the TV and it so happened to magically work out.

This was actually taken at night.

APRIL 30th

Another shot in front of my TV, except this one is a silhouette.

I use this as my profile picture for just about everything. I'll change it when there's a photo that tops this one.

2020

MARCH 22nd

This was a turning point in my photography career. I feel this photo divided the line between bad photos and the start of something good.

This was originally shot in color with a $20-something dollar Home Depot light, but it taught me the importance of a single light.

This photo also helped me process the idea that I'm not a kid anymore.

FEBRUARY 14th

I wanted to explore tension. In retrospect, it could have been better executed, but these were taken on our bathroom walls.

I used my brother's Dollar Tree Valentine heart shaped balloons and our kitchen knife.

DECEMBER 4th

This was actually inspired by a sad girl mint themed TikTok I'd seen. Except I couldn't help but act happy all throughout.

And this started a tradition to take photos of myself every birthday with a different theme each time.

AUGUST 19th

This was my last self-portrait shoot on Automatic in front of my house's gate. I used the on camera flash with a red cellophane sheet taped on the lens.

I didn't like the red too much in post so I converted it to B&W and upped the contrast for the grungy look.

AUGUST 13th

We had these holographic covered boards lying around, I think for construction and they reflected light so nicely, so they became backdrops.

APRIL 29th

This was the first photoshoot that veered me down the path of more suggestive matter.

It was the first time I saw myself and really thought, "Wow! I can look like that? That is me?"

And this defined self-portraits going forward for me.

2019

MARCH 12th

I had a red umbrella and I wanted to do something with it. The days were rainy, campus was empty, so I went, also aware that I hadn't shot in so long.

This was right before everything closed down. I wouldn't be back to visit campus for another two years.

JANUARY 6th

I started the idea with wanting to make my own calendar, a self portrait for each month of the year.

It didn't work out, but it gave me a lot of photos to mess around with in Photoshop and Illustrator, such as this one, originally a yellow sweater and blue fabric backdrop I'd taped to my living room wall.

Unfortunately, it kept falling.

2018

JANUARY ??th

You made it. The very first self portrait. I'm a high school junior, Winter Formal is nearing and I need some photos for my flyers. I'm running for Winter Formal Princess. I wondered if this made me too vain.

My sister helped out with this, my co-conspirer. We placed a white blanket on our brick wall, used weights to steady it and I borrowed my cousin's tiara.

Anyway, I lost.

DECEMBER 28th

These were originally for a mini series to include in my college applications.

One of the colleges asked for a self-portrait. So I submitted 8.

I'll admit though, I was still kinda shy about it back then. Now, less so.